

Writing Task 1 Question 1
The two pie charts indicate changes in age range of people who Facebook between the two periods. 13-24 years old of Facebook users fell dramatically. Instead, increasing Facebook users aged 25-40 years old. Between the two periods 2005 and 2015, 13-24 years old of Facebook users fell 20 percentage points from 51% to 31%. 15% increased in 25-40 years old of Facebook users. Thus, young people are using Facebook less and less. Facebook users who were 13-24 years old in 2005 aged 10 years. Consequently, the proportion of 25-40 years old in 2015 has increased. Next, 41-65 years old of Facebook users increased from 16% to 19% 66-80 years old of Facebook users also increased from 1% to 3%. Therefore, the proportion of 13-24 years old only decreased. Finally, the top age range of Facebook users changed from 13-24 years old to 25-40 years old between 2005 and 2015. However, third and fourth places remained the same.
The two pie charts indicate changes in the age range of people who use Facebook between the two periods. 13-24 years old of Facebook users fell dramatically, increasing Facebook users aged 25-40 years old. Between the two periods 2005 and 2015, 13-24 years old of Facebook users fell 20 percentage points from 51% to 31%. There was a 15% increase in 25-40 years old of Facebook users. Thus, the usage of Facebook among young people was on the decline. Facebook users who were 13-24 years old in 2005 aged in 10 years. Consequently, the proportion of 25-40 years old in 2015 increased. Next, 41-65 years old of Facebook users increased from 16% to 19%, 66-80 years old Facebook users also increased from 1% to 3%. Therefore, the proportion of 13-24 years old only decreased. Finally, the top age range of Facebook users changed from 13-24 to 25-40 between 2005 and 2015. However, third and fourth places remained the same.
こんな方にオススメ
2. Add this word to complete the non-restrictive clause.
3,7, 8,9, and 10. Remove these terms to avoid wordiness.
4 and 5. Use these for better expression.
6. Add this word to complete the prepositional phrase in this sentence.