Original

同僚に手助けが必要か聞いてみよう

Offering to help
あなたは同僚に電話して、新しいプロジェクトに関して何か手伝おうかと申し出るつもりです。
新プロジェクトと同じくらい重要な何かについて電話で話すことはまぁいいでしょうが、そのこと全てについて話し合うには直接会って理解を深めましょう。手伝いを申し出ましょう、でも自分の能力の限度を超えるほど手を広げ過ぎないように。
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Hello?
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Writingレッスンの例
Best Teacherで実際に行われている直近のWritingレッスンです。
作成したスクリプトは講師により添削されます。
Hello?

Hi, Bob. How are you? I heard that you are assigned a member of Project A which is related to AI. How is it going so far? As you know, I dealed with a project about AI last month. When I entered this company, I didn't know even where to save a file. Do you remember that you always helped me at that time? So if you need any help with Project A, please count me!

自然な表現

Hi, Bob. How are you? I heard that you were assigned a member of Project A which is related to AI. How is it going so far? As you know, I dealt with a project about AI last month. When I entered this company, I didn't even know where to save a file. Do you remember that you always helped me at that time? So if you need any help with Project A, please count on me!

1. use past tense when the reporting verb 'heard' is in the past.
2. deal/dealt/dealt (this is the past tense of this irregular verb)
3. place 'even' before the main verb and after the auxiliary.
4. count ON someone
Hi, Kaede. I now remember that you did a similar project before. Can you tell me what were the things that you specifically worked on with the project?

I worked as a mediator between customers and AI programers. Customers had a lot of requirement for AI system, such as.. they wanted AI system to behave like as real people, to be as simple as possible to maintain them easily, and to be compact for saving a cost of saver. It was sometime difficult to meet all of that requirement within limited cost and schedule, so I worked with both customers and programers to keep their cooperative structure. I think you are working as somewhat some role as I did. Are there anything I can help you?

自然な表現

I worked as a mediator between customers and AI programmers. Customers had a lot of requirements about AI system, such as.. they wanted AI system to behave like real people, to be as simple as possible to maintain them easily, and to be compact for saving costs. It was sometimes difficult to meet all the requirements within limited cost and schedule, so I worked with both customers and programmers to keep their cooperative structure. I think you have somewhat the same role as I didIs there anything I can help you with?

1. check the spelling (double M)
2. a lot of +plural noun
3. requirement ABOUT something
4. behave like someone (no AS)
5. be compact for saving costs (this sounds more natural)
6. check the spelling
7. mee all the+plural noun
8. check the spelling
9. have the same role as someone else
10. Is+there
11. help someone WITH something
Well, I'd like to know how you started your job for the project that you did. Did you start with the programmers or did you start with the clients?

I started with clients because to implement clients' request was our first mission. However there were some limit and it was impossible to meet all of the request. In addition, sometime clients didn't have enough technological point of view to make up whole system. So after listening requests from clients, I went to programmer to ask what was possible and what was impossible. If programmer said it was impossible to make some requirement, we consulted with both programmer and clients to make the best products with clients' view of point and programmers' view of point.

自然な表現

I started with clients because to implement clients' request was our first mission. However, there were some limits and it was impossible to meet all of the requests. In addition, sometimes clients didn't have enough technological point of view to make up the whole system. So after listening to requests from clients, I went to programmers to ask what was possible and what was impossible. If programmers said it was impossible to meet some requirement, we consulted with both programmers and clients to make the best products from clients' point of view and programmers' view of point.

1. add a comma after however
2. were+plural noun
3. all of the+plural noun
4. check the spelling (sometimes)
5. THE+whole system
6. listen TO requests from clients
7. use a plural noun to refer to more than one
8. same as explanation 7
9. meet the requirements (not MAKE)
10. same as explanation 7
11. from someone's point of view
That's a good strategy. Were there times that you could not get the consensus of both parties? What did you do to come up with something?

To get the consensus of both was always difficult. At that time, understanding what they wanted was really important. There must be some reason that they persisted to their plans. When you understand why they want, you can provide how and what to do for them. By doing in this way, it will be easier to get consenses and to agree with them.

自然な表現

To get the consensus of both sides was always difficult. At that time, understanding what they wanted was really important. There must be some reason that they persisted with their plans. When you understand what they want, you can understand how and what to do for them. By doing so, it will be easier to get a consensus and agree with them.

1. both+sides
2. persist WITH something
3. WHAT someone wants
4. this verb fits the context better
5. use 'so' to replace what has been said previously
6. add 'a' and check the spelling (one consensus)
7. omit 'to' because you have it before 'and' so it refers to this verb as well.
That's good to know. Will you be available during the project? I might need your inputs while doing the said project.

Of course! In these days, I am working at Yokohama office. You are now working at Marunouchi office, right? I usually go to Marunouchi office on Wednesday and Friday. When you need my help, please call me. I think I can make a time at lunch time or after 5 p.m. on Wednesday and Friday. If you are busy, it is also OK to contact me with e-mails.

自然な表現

Of course! These days, I am working at Yokohama office. You are now working at Marunouchi office, right? I usually go to Marunouchi office on Wednesday and Friday. When you need my help, please call me. I think I can make a time at lunch time or after 5 p.m. on Wednesday and Friday. If you are busy, it is also OK to contact me by e-mails.

1. no prepositions before demonstrative pronouns
2. contact someone BY emails.
  • empathy(共感)
  • sympathy(同情)
  • relate(関連する、好意的に受け取る)
  • understand(理解する)
  • counseling(カウンセリング、相談、助言)
  • advise(〔人に〕アドバイス[助言]を求める、アドバイス[忠告・助言・勧告]する、勧める)
  • guidance(ガイダンス、指導すること)
  • support(サポート、手助け)
  • encouragement(激励、励まし、勇気づけること)
  • empower(~に力を与える、(人)を力づける)
  • I can certainly empathize with you.(あなたに深く共感いたします。)
  • Can I offer you some words of encouragement?(励ましの言葉をかけさせていただけますか?)
  • I can relate to what you're going through.(あなたがこれからすることに私も関与できます。)
  • Please rely on your family and friends for guidance.(ご家族やご友人の助言を頼ってください。)
  • I'll always be here if you need to talk.(君が話したいときは、いつでも聞くよ。)
  • I feel your pain.(あなたの辛い気持ちはよく分かります。)
  • I understand what you're going through.(君が何をしようとしているのか分かっているよ。)
  • You have my deepest sympathy.(あなたに深く同情いたします。)
  • Can I offer you some unsolicited advice?(おせっかいながら提案をしてもよろしいでしょうか。)
  • I hope these words will empower you to fight this.(これらの言葉が、あなたがこれに立ち向かうための力となりますように。)

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