Original

休暇を取りたいことを伝えよう

Asking for a one week vacation
海外では休暇の概念や期間も日本とは根本的に違うので、その国の重要な休日を前もって調べておきましょう。日本では年末から正月までがお休みですがアメリカではThanks givingやクリスマスの休みはありますが、基本的には新年はNew Year's day(元日)だけがお休みで1月2日から通常営業になります。
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Hi, what can I do for you?
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Hi, what can I do for you?

I'm here to discuss about my vacation. I would like to take a quite long one.

自然な表現

I'm here to discuss  my vacation. I would like to take a very long one.

1. It is repetitive and redundant. It should be removed.
2. You are right. It is an expression also applicable here.
How many weeks of paid vacation are we talking about? Do you consider to take the whole month off from work, or just a couple of weeks, maybe two weeks? I cannot find any other substitutes for you, since you are working on those projects, so I cannot uphold the projects without you for a very long time. Do you know how long you will be off?

I would like to take it a year at least. I don't think to continue recent busy situation for me. I don't want to say my health condition but I had blood pee these days. If I would continue this work, I will die sooner or later.

自然な表現

I would like to take  a year at least. I don't think I want to continue the recent busy situation. I don't want to say anything about my health condition but I have been peeing blood these days. If I  continue this work, I will die sooner or later.

1. It is repetitive and redundant. It should be removed.
2&5. I have added an expression to an incomplete sentence.
3. This article is the word 'the,' and it refers directly to a specific noun or group of nouns.
4. The expression only weakens the message. Drop it.
6. The progressive form is better here. It is a verb tense used to show an ongoing action in progress at some point in time. Gerunds are words that are formed with verbs but act as nouns.
7. It is redundant in this context and should be removed.
Why? Are you stressed out and overworked? Do you worry there will be consequences to your health, because of working too hard in recent months, on your project? You need to stay healthy, I agree. You have to decide on your life path.

Thank you for your undetrstanding. Actually, I don't want to bring my private issue to my work but, I have to say it. My son commited a crime last year. The crime reported on paper so, possibly you know that. The trial in court has been continued. During that time, my work is harder than before. I can't cope both heavy problem for now.

自然な表現

Thank you for your understanding. Actually, I don't want to bring my private issues to my work, but I have to say it. My son committed a crime last year. The crime was reported in the papers so, possibly you know about that. The trial in court has been continuing. During that time, my work got harder than before. I can't cope with both heavy problems for now.

1&4. It could be a typo or spelling mistake. Correct it.
2. There could be more than one.
3. You misplaced the comma.
5. You have a subject but no verb.
6. It is not the best preposition in this context. Replace it.
7&10. You are missing preposition, and it should be added.
8. The progressive form is better here. It is a verb tense used to show an ongoing action in progress at some point in time. Gerunds are words that are formed with verbs but act as nouns.
9. It happened in the past. Let us keep the narrative where it belongs.
11. The number is more than one.
I understand your problems, Sir. Can I propose a solution that I believe will be good for you and the company? Unfortunately, we cannot give you a whole year off, but we can offer fewer working hours per day, and extra weeks off when needed.

Thank you for your good suggestion. I will choose fewer hours per day. Let discuss how we can find the best way for us. I don't want to harm to our company by my choice so, we have to consider it carefully.

自然な表現

Thank you for your good suggestion. I will choose fewer hours per day. Let discuss how we can find the best way for us. I don't want to harm  our company with my choice, so we have to consider it carefully.

1. It is redundant in this context and should be removed.
2. It is not the best preposition in this context. Replace it.
3. You misplaced the comma.
You will fill some papers in the HR department, saying you want fewer hours per day, as discussed. I will give you my authorization on paper to do so. I will notify the HR department, and you can convey all your planned ahead schedule to them. We will support you in this as much as possible.We expect though, you will be in control of your projects.

I appreciate your concern. I am in a bad situation but, it will be over before to long. I hope my colleagues would understand my decision. I know they are working hard everyday. I don't want to disappoint them but, there is no alternative but to leave the project for now.

自然な表現

I appreciate your concern. I am in a bad situation, but it will be over before too long. I hope my colleagues would understand my decision. I know they are working hard every day. I don't want to disappoint them. There is no alternative but to leave the project for now.

Excellent performance.
1. You misplaced the comma.
2. It could be a typo or spelling mistake. Correct it.
3. Everyday is a single word and is an adjective, so it's the one that is used in front of a noun to describe something as normal or commonplace. Every day is an adjective (every) plus a noun (day), and it means each day.
4. Too many "but."
  • paid vacation(有給休暇)
  • for the entire week(来週丸々)
  • stay healthy(健康でいてください)
  • excuse my question(私の質問を詫びる)
  • I am planning to~(~する予定になっています)
  • Sounds nice!(素敵ですね!)
  • Have you ever been to~(~へ行った事はありますか?)
  • I need to keep my mind focused.(私は心を集中させておく必要があります。)
  • Sorry to bother you.(お邪魔してごめんなさい。)
  • Will you be able to complete your assigned task by the 28th of October?(10/28までに割り当てられた仕事を完了できますか?)
  • I want to go abroad after my project.(自分のプロジェクト終了後、海外へ行きたいのです。 )
  • I'd love to take a vacation to the Philippines someday.(ぜひともフィリッピンに休暇で行ってみたいものです。)
  • What's your favorite thing about staying there?(滞在中でやりたいことで好きなことはなんですか? )

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