ビジネスメールを書こう

Exchanging business emails
講師と英文メール形式でやり取りをすることで、実践で役立つビジネスメールのスキルを身に着けましょう。 以下の構成を参考にメールを作成してみましょう。Writing講師がメール形式で返信するので、メール形式で更に返信しましょう。 1. Subject line(件名) 2. Formal greeting(挨拶) 3. Body copy(本文) 4. Closing phrase(結び) 5. Signature(署名)
Please write a business email. A teacher will reply to it.
 
このレッスンを始める
Writingレッスンの例
Best Teacherで実際に行われている直近のWritingレッスンです。
作成したスクリプトは講師により添削されます。
Please write a business email that needs to be corrected.

Hi Ben
If we are settling by credit card, can you guys give us an immediate confirmation through the AAA system?
If we make payment to you by bank transfer and send proof of payment, would it be faster for you to confirm payment there?
The reason I ask the above is that we are being rushed by our clients to complete registrations quickly. It would be great if you give me some advice.
Regards,
Hanako

自然な表現

Hi Ben,

If we are settling by credit card, can you    give us an immediate confirmation through the AAA system?
If we pay by bank transfer and send proof of payment, will it be faster for you to confirm   ?
The reason I ask    is that we are being rushed by our clients to complete registration quickly. It would be great if you could give me some advice.

Regards,
Hanako

1. Add a comma after the salutation.
2. Remove this word because it is a business letter.
3. Simply use "pay" to avoid wordiness and make the sentence easier to understand.
4. In the first conditional, the correct pattern is: if + subject + present v, subject + will
5 and 6. Remove these words because they are redundant.
7. This is uncountable.
8. In the second conditional, the correct pattern is: if + subject + past v, subject + would


Note: Spacing has been adjusted throughout the conversation.
Dear Hanako,

We appreciate your reaching out to us about this matter.
Either of the two payment processes is fine with us as both can be confirmed right away.
Please proceed with whatever is convenient for you and inform us when payment is done.

Do you have any other concerns?

Best regards,
Ben

Hi Ben,
Thank you for your help. I clicked the green button next to the top right corner and it seems working.
I downloaded the invoice as I attached.
Is it possible to leave the transfer to complete the other registration requirements? Or do I have to make the transfer to proceed?
Regards,
Hanako

自然な表現

Hi Ben,

Thank you for your help. I clicked the green button next to the top right corner, and it seemed to work.
I downloaded the invoice   .
Is it possible to skip the transfer to complete the other registration requirements, or do I have to make the transfer to proceed?

Regards,
Hanako

1. Add a comma before a conjunction that joins two independent clauses.
2. Use the past tense since the other verb is in the same tense.
3. "seem + to + base verb"
4. To "attach" is to join a file such as a document or a picture to an email. What did you attach?
 These words make the sentence confusing, so they are removed. You may clarify with the speaking teacher what you meant.
5. Use "skip" to mean to not do or have something; avoid.
6. Since we cannot start a sentence with "or," use a comma to connect the clauses.
7. Capitalization correction
Dear Hanako,

Please make the transfer to proceed. That's the SOP in this situation. Then, follow the prompt.
Please let me know how it goes.

Best regards,
Ben

Hi Ben,
Could you please check our payment status as I attached?
Please let me know if you have any questions.
Regards,
Hanako

自然な表現

Hi Ben,

Could you please check our payment status   ?
Please let me know if you have any questions.

Regards,
Hanako

1. To "attach" is to join a file such as a document or a picture to an email. What did you attach?
These words make the sentence confusing, so they are removed. You may clarify with the speaking teacher what you meant.
  • Dear ~(〜様)
  • sales(営業)
  • I have attached ~(〜を添付しました)
  • as follows(以下の通りです)
  • I would request ~(〜を依頼します)
  • Thank you in advance.(よろしくお願いします。)
  • Thank you for your interest.(ご興味をお持ちいただきありがとうございます。)
  • Thank you for your prompt reply.(早速のご回答ありがとうございました。)
  • It is a pleasure working with you.(あなたと一緒に仕事が出来て嬉しいです。)
  • I am looking forward to working with you.(あなたと働くのを楽しみにしています。)

こんな方にオススメ

  • ビジネス
  • 初級
  • Eメール添削
  • 内定者研修
  • 新入社員研修