会社の売上高の構成内容について説明しよう

Sales Content.
あなたは会社の売上高の構成内容について説明しています。
多角的に事業を展開している企業はもちろん、小規模の企業においても、売上の内容を把握しておくことは大切です。特に売上に貢献しているものは何かなど、すぐに答えられるようにしておきましょう。
Please tell me about the company's sales.
 
このレッスンを始める
Writingレッスンの例
Best Teacherで実際に行われている直近のWritingレッスンです。
作成したスクリプトは講師により添削されます。
Please tell me about the company's sales.

This company is so large that it is difficult to grasp the sales data. As I mentioned before, it has fifth segments, including Energy Systems, Infrastructure Systems, and Digital Solutions. So I tried simplifying the data so that you all can understand it easily. Here it is. Do you have any questions?

自然な表現

This company is so large that it is difficult to grasp the sales data. As I mentioned before, it has five segments, including Energy Systems, Infrastructure Systems, and Digital Solutions. Therefore, I tried simplifying the data so that you can all understand it easily. Here it is. Do you have any questions?

1. "Fifth" is used to refer to something that is fifth in a row - fifth place, fifth floor, etc. Here, you should use "five" to refer to five segments.
2. Avoid using “so”, “and”, “but”, or “because” (conjunctions) at the beginning of a sentence. Merge those sentences into one or use “therefore”, “also”, “furthermore”, “hence”, “however”, and similar.
3. This would be a more natural word order.
Thank you for the information. Could you please explain the major sales trends shown by the data? What were our strongest areas?

That is the point. We used to be called one of the leading companies in Japan. You know we have been criticized by many people because of the fraudulent accounting several years ago. However, we still have cutting-edge techniques. That is why we keep the position in the market of Energy systems. 40% of our sales come from there. In addition, its methods increase the value of our infrastructure projects due to the arrangement of the skills of energy systems to infrastructure. Now, nearly 30% of our sales come from the infrastructure business.

自然な表現

That is the point. We used to be called one of the leading companies in Japan. You know we have been criticized by many people because of the fraudulent accounting several years ago. However, we still have cutting-edge techniques. That is why we keep our position in the market for energy systems. 40% of our sales come from there. In addition, its methods increase the value of our infrastructure projects due to the arrangement of the skills of energy systems to infrastructure. Now, nearly 30% of our sales come from the infrastructure business.

1. It would be more appropriate to use "our" here to refer to the position.
2. It might be more appropriate to use "for" here to express what the market is for.
3. There is no need to use an uppercase here.
That sounds like a very positive result. However, do you think that there is still room for improvement?

To put it simply, how about the restructuring of our organization? As I mentioned before, we have five operational divisions. However, while the main three divisions have prominent sales figures, the rest of them don't. We can improve our performance if we restructure our organization to streamline operations and the number of divisions from five to three. We might also use the synergy from their more efficiently, and then increase our sales figure altogether.

自然な表現

To put it simply, how about the restructuring of our organization? As I mentioned before, we have five operational divisions. However, while the main three divisions have prominent sales figures, the rest of them don't. We can improve our performance if we restructure our organization to streamline operations and reduce the number of divisions from five to three. We might also use their synergy more efficiently, and then increase our sales figures altogether.

1. You should add "reduce" here to clarify what you mean.
2. It would be more natural to say "their synergy".
3. Use the plural when speaking in a general sense.
  • quarter over quarter(前四半期に比べて)
  • boost sales(売り上げを伸ばす)
  • shareholder(株主)
  • margin(余白、マージン)
  • slightly(わずかに、少し)
  • We anticipate that sales will increase slightly.(売上高は若干の増加を見込んでいます。)
  • Our corporate performance is mainly due to asset management.(当社の企業業績は、主に資産運用によるものです。)
  • Our capital structure is manly divided into three business lines.(私たちの売上は大きく3つの事業部門によって成り立っています。)
  • Profits have been in decline for the past three years.(この3年間、利益は減少しています。)
  • Overseas sales will increase within two years.(海外売上は2年以内に上昇すると見込んでいます。)

こんな方にオススメ

  • ビジネス
  • 中級
  • 金融業界
  • 経理・財務業務