工場の作業環境改善の施策について話し合おう

Let's discuss how to improve the factory's working environment
あなたは工場の作業環境の改善に関するミーティングに出席しています。
工場の作業環境は、製品の質や生産効率を上げるためにも、作業者の安全や健康を保つためにも大事ですね。実際の工場の現場を想定して、色々なアイデアを出してみましょう。
Let's talk about proposals for the improvement of the working environment.
 
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Best Teacherで実際に行われている直近のWritingレッスンです。
作成したスクリプトは講師により添削されます。
Let's talk about proposals for the improvement of the working environment.

I heard from some employees about our factory's work environment and it wasn't good when I visited our ABC factory last week. I went there to check out the actual situation. I thought that "3S activity" was not done in some areas. I asked one manager, " do you know about the 3S activity? ". He said, "What is that, sorry I never heard of it". I felt we need to deploy the 3S activity to improve our work environment. By the way, you also know the keyword, right?

自然な表現

I heard from some employees about our factory's work environment and it wasn't good when I visited our ABC factory last week. I went there to check out the actual situation. I thought that the "3S activity" was not done in some areas. I asked one manager, "do you know about the 3S activity?". He said, "What is that, sorry I've never heard of it". I felt we needed to deploy the 3S activity to improve our work environment. By the way, you also know the keyword, right?

1 - add 'the' as you're referring to a specific activity
2 - use the present perfect to refer to emphasize something that happened in the past without a specific time
3 - should be in the past as you're referring to something that already happened.
Actually, we aren't familiar with the keyword. I assume that refers to certain standards. Am I correct?

That's right. The 3S is the name of a work environment improvement method that uses three Japanese words. These Japanese words have been converted to English to Sorting, Setting-in-Order, Shining. The order of these words is the most important. At first, we must do "Sorting". "Sorting" means to keep only essential items and eliminate things not required. I thought that our factory could not do "Sorting". What do you think?

自然な表現

That's right. The 3S is the name of a work environment improvement method that uses three Japanese words. These Japanese words have been converted to English as Sorting, Setting-in-Order, Shining. The order of these words is the most important. At first, we must do "Sorting". "Sorting" means to keep only essential items and eliminate things not required. I thought that our factory could not do "Sorting". What do you think?

1 - converted to English 'as' + meaning/translation of the word.
I think that we could improve that area if necessary. Please continue with your presentation. We are listening closely.

Yes, I understand your opinion. However existing work environment is not good, so it is necessary for us to make continuous improvement in the work environment. We need to start this project. One of the purposes of doing this is to keep our employee's safety. I think it is our responsibility.

自然な表現

Yes, I understand your opinion. However, the existing work environment is not good, so it is necessary for us to make continuous improvements in the work environment. We need to start this project. One of the purposes of doing this is to keep our employees safe. I think it is our responsibility.

1 - isolate connecting words like 'however' with a comma
2 - add 'the' as you're referring to a specific environment
3 - should be plural as you're referring to improvements in general
4 - should be plural as you're referring to employees
5 - keep employees + adjective.
  • health(健康)
  • work environment(作業環境)
  • productivity(生産効率)
  • safety(安全)
  • flextime(フレックスタイム)
  • Do not forget to protect the safety and health of your employees.(従業員の安全と健康を守ることを忘れてはならない。)
  • I propose automating the system in order to increase productivity.(生産性を上げるため、システムを機械化することを提案します。)
  • Let‘s adopt a flextime system in this factory.(この工場にフレックスタイム制を導入しましょう。)
  • Mechanization will contribute to keeping workers safe.(機械化は労働者の保全に貢献するでしょう。)
  • Do you have any other solutions to improve the work environment?(労働環境を向上させるための他の解決策は何かありますか?)

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